Coming up to 40

Zouzou will be 40 in November!! And I am terrified.

You will bear with me but I have questions, as usual. Jimmy Cliff kuku sang that ‘there are more questions than answers’…abi? or was it ‘I want to Know, Everybody Wants to Know?’ Whichever….questions sha abounds; why do people celebrate specific birthdays?? Is it genuine thanksgiving or plain desire to splash money, be the centre of attention and generally feel special?? The slightest opportunity calls for a bash. I can identify with 25^th and 50^th birthdays, and that’s probably because these are mentioned in the bible, but when and why has 40^th become the norm? Practically everyone throws a party ‘…@40!’ Please note that I am not judging oh. I am only wondering and pondering. It is ‘unfortunate’ that I have all these ‘abnormal’ thoughts. I only feel that some things are way more important than others. Anyways, biko, know that I love you even though you are a party (and-many-other-things) freak. Not judging. J

So, here I am, 40 years old,  cancer-free, diabetic-free, grey-hair-free (though I had begun to wish for grey hair from as long as I can remember, that just aint happening!), and all other female-related/old age illness free. Even my eyes are perfect! Blessed beyond belief. I wish I could recount all the blessings here...but you know them. That I have breath is enough.

So why the terror?  Why this ‘panic-attack?’ Because of their expectations. Yes, them. They want/expect a party, in fact, they are singing it in my ear already. I just pretend to not hear, but they don’t give up. Strong-willed they are. They have already guessed that I have something ‘bad’ up my sleeves, they are not wrong. I am planning an escape.

My wish is for the day to pass uneventfully, like any other day I open my eyes and am grateful for life. Big parties and centre of attention is not something I crave... Remember last year? I did absolutely nothing. I actually rejected gifts, and instead gave out some. #Justdosomethingdifferentyouknow?

I did not say I don’t like birthday parties o. I do remember having them, just not of any specific age (in fact, I remember throwing a party on the day I clocked 1 year…in the Lord! Oh yes, those are the kind of things I would do!).

Sha, my plan (of escape) would be to camp out on my bed watching one of those TV series all day or find one of those bestseller thriller to immerse myself in, I wish Vince Flynn had released the next of Mitch Rapps's escapades, that would have made my day. And if at 42, or 45 or 63 I wake up and feel the need for a party, then I would have a blast! I just do not believe I should be boxed into traditions of men and become a prisoner of 'culture and traditions and norm,’ and some other unexplainable ideas of 'that’s just how it is done. 'Who?' In fact, I think it’s even a Tuesday, or Wednesday  so I shall be at my desk. :-). #fimisile.

Do you forget that there be very many ways of ‘giving thanks?’ A party is just one option…oh yeah, the very one I plan to not take! *big grin*

Lol: I was scribbling these thoughts furiously in my book recently at a meeting and someone who had noticed me writing with such concentration asked what I was writing, when I told him, he said that having a party in itself is not a bad thing, and that people celebrate (each decade) for a reason, he went further to say that in my case, even if I feel I do not want to do something, that I am surrounded by ‘so great a cloud of witnesses’ (my words) I may not be able to get away with it. All the more reason to be terrified. Maybe I will flee to Ghana come November. The surprise isn’t going to be on me, I guarantee you, it will have to be on you, this is a test of my (strong) will. Welcome the big 4-0.

(Let me) be free oh

Oya oh. Make una start with comments. I dey wait.