Monday, September 14

No Glasses on, I Suppose?

You know how we mostly struggle to embrace or accept 'the new,' or the fact that something is (dares to be) different? How we stubbornly refuse to accept change even if it is the natural progression in a situation? And the way we struggle, one would think it were life-threatening. 

‘No glasses on, I suppose?’ This was the response a dear friend sent me after I completely mutilated the English language in a text I sent to him. I had been doing that - writing bad grammar in text messages - for a while then. Thank God for the retract function on BBM!

But what is responsible for this? Two things, I believed: I got new reading glasses, and I changed my phone. To a touch screen. And I just could not deal with the touch-y thing! So I blamed the phone for the bad grammar. I did not think to blame my impatience to hit the ‘send’ button without editing but, that was because it is the entire text that gets mangled! That cannot be a coincidence. I also did not consider the fact that I may not be seeing the tiny characters as clearly as I should. And, I conveniently forgot that my eyesight isn't exactly 20/20; I had used reading glasses briefly last year (a fact I hid from most people), but I lost them and I moved on. 

I realized that there was problem when some time last year a document I used to  effortlessly read suddenly seemed unreadable. So, I went back to the ophthalmologist who (of course) recommended glasses again. But because I was in self-denial, all I did with my glasses was read that particularly troublesome document. It never occurred to me to have them on when I used my phone, or read anything else, I just squinted away instead. It therefore came as a shock to be asked why I didn't have my glasses on while I was texting. That brought me up short and I thought in wonder, this is a new season in my life. Here is change: I am aging, my eyesight is proof! Omg! 

So I woke up to the realization that this is now a part of my life that I must embrace. Although I still struggle, not wanting to have them on to read everything so that I don't get used to them, I have come to terms with the fact that this is a necessary development that I should (must) accept. And so I did; with grace and aplomb (the fact that they do look cool and snazzy is not lost on me though). And I have come to appreciate how easy they are on my eyes. Needless to say, texting is better…all I need is a bit more patience not to hit the ‘send’ button too fast. 

I wonder what sort of season you should (ought to) be coming to terms with. I wonder what 'glasses' you should have on that you shy away from...we should learn to simplify life, it being so short... 

Be free oh.

Thursday, September 3

Do You Have a 'Denis?'

I sat down to my evening meal yesterday and was about to dig in when my phone rang. I looked at the caller ID and it was ‘Denis’. He always calls. I rolled my eyes and ignored the call, then dug into my meal, forgetting about him. For the moment.

But who is this ‘Denis?’ He is a young man that worked as a Man Friday (for want of a better description) at one of the places I used to live, and ever since we moved out, (about 6 years now) Denis, would call from time to time, like clockwork. I mostly ignore his calls, but when I do take it, his narration is always the same: he is only calling to say ‘hello’ and while at it, he would apologize for waiting that long to call, then go on to ask about my family by name and…call ends. Always the same. 

But while I ate, I kept thinking about him and something struck me for the first time: DENIS NEVER ASKS ME FOR ANYTHING. He only calls to check up on me. So why is it I never take his call? Why would such an innocent call irritate me? Have I become so independent, so ‘un-needy’ and so insular that being checked up on is unwelcome? I felt terrible thinking about it. Our life is full of a mix of people. God must have put them there to give us some balance. If we are expending ourselves in some areas, perhaps this ‘Denis’ is a reminder that that you are loved, and thought without added pressure? After all, we do need a support system, some of which come in form of a Denis, (along with with so many like him, the Bogas, the Saturdays, the Fridays, the Iks, the Solomons), These are part of my own community. 

Needless to say, I called Denis back, and the conversation this time was very different. I responded very warmly, and I believe he would have been pleased, that is, if he even noticed that I was a tad cold on previous calls! 

Do you have a 'Denis?' I hope that your disposition towards him (or her) would change from today, and that you would make peace by being the one to call them up for once.

Food for thought: What do people think when your name show up on their phone? I wonder if their faces light up in pleasure, or if they grimace, hiss and roll their eyes? I would feel terrible if I thought that was the reaction my caller id gets. 

Be Free Oh.

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