Have you ever experienced that feeling of acute disappointment? Like someone cut out your heart because something you expected, something you believed was rightly yours, something you are so sure was coming to you because you worked so hard at it never arrived? Worse, it went to the least likely person, who, by all estimation is NOT qualified for it? Have you ever experienced that feeling?! Of course you have!
Have you ever anxiously, happily and excitedly gone some place, in the hope of finding something that you seek, fully expecting it to be right there, just waiting to be claimed, but what you ran smack into was…nothing? What happened to your heart? Can you recall that feeling??
Have you ever believed in someone, so much, so totally, so completely, with everything that you are and this person turns around to (oops, that word again!) disappoint you? It sure felt like someone put a knife through your heart and yanked it out; a physical jolt. The pain of such disappointment is real.
What makes the pain worse? For me, it is because I believed with everything I know to believe with: prayers, faith, trust, great expectation and the hope that these people, whoever they are, were worth it.
But let’s face it; as long as we are humans, disappointments, as we see them, will always be a way of life. As much as the hurt and pain of it make us want to cut ties with the rest of the human race and gird ourselves by building impenetrable walls, the fact remains that as long as we are breathing, disappointments and all its accoutrements will be part of our lives, and sometimes in our own selves, but how we deal with it is what matters. Shake it off and move on? Easier said than done, I wager, but really, that is it!
The part we so self-righteously forget is the fact that we have, at some point in our own lives, been a source of disappointment to people; we have promised and failed, failed to be there, failed to give of our resources, our time, and ourselves. Selfishly ensconced in our own private corners, unwilling to be disturbed, unwilling to allow the waves of other people’s despair and need so much as penetrate our walls long enough to touch us…we absolutely need to rememeber that, but more, to know that it should not always be that way, that disappointments and pains can be managed, in the hope of a better tomorrow, because better will always come.
Who has never suffered disappointments? Who has not failed to be there at some point?’ I have, and yes, I have too!
Be Free Oh