Wednesday, October 12

(Dont) Rub My Back

Again, I began to think about 'contraints',  how draining it can be, how burdensome and, how typical of us humans....
First off, I am not the perfect person, friend, sister, colleague etc. Hahaha, no way. In fact, I can categorically tell you that I am by far far, the less than perfect sister!  I always thought that I would never allow my sisters to write a tribute to me oh, because if they wanted to write in all honesty, they would tell you what a terribly grouchy ‘yeller’ I am. And that  when there are  issues at home, I become so irritated and taciturn; I don’t want to talk about it, leave me alone, and escape to my room!
But, that is not what this blog is about. I suddenly began to think that the people I need now are those who can be true, who can be themselves with me, just as I hope I can be to them.  The Yorubas have an adage (something like) you cannot say ‘we aren’t friends anymore’, well, I beg to differ o! I can totally tell you that ‘I am not doing’ friend again o!  I can sooo say it! While I am not saying we must all be the same (an impossibility if we must be frank), there must at least, be that basic understanding that friendships can and should thrive on without fear.
I don’t care to have many ‘friends’ on Face Book, just because you are the friend of a friend of a friend doesn’t mean we should automatically become friends, duh. If we cannot add value to one another, then there really is no point. If all someone does is make you laugh and you know you need that, please do your best to keep such a one close by, and do all your best to work at the relationship, but according to TD Jakes, ‘if people can walk away from you, let them walk’. ..The reverse should also be the case. (Na my opinion be that o).
So friends, be yourself; let’s not ‘rub’ each other’s back because that is how it should be. Rub my back because you know I need and deserve it, not because I rubbed yours when it hurt! Don’t follow me because I am following you, and please, do not expect the same of me. Don’t share a secret with me because I shared some with you. The greatest help you can do yourself and others is to be ‘free oh’… I have no expectations of you; why should you burden yourself? 
Again I say; we do tend to think of ourselves as being right and perfect, I am not I am not I am not! I only say it as I believe it should be, and that me, Zaynabu; I do not want to be burdened more than I already am. 
And when I stumbled on what’s on the link below, I realized (once again) that I am not abnormal after all! Ope o! *big grin and thumbs up, DNW*
Abeg biko…be free oh.

1 comment:

  1. Oh my goodness. Zee. do you know I was reading this and I was saying to myself that' this is so spooky, this woman could be me....She thinks like me... and then I get to the bottom of your blog and see my blog! I had to laugh out loud honest cos you so get me on this matter...Or do I so get you? Lol!

    I love your blogs Zee and even though I dont always comment, do know that!

    Bola, The DNW

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