Friday, March 23

Whose Fault?

On my way home a few nights ago, I tuned in on a radio station having an interactive session on ‘Teenage Pregnancy’, and whose fault it was that that phenomena is on the increase in Nigeria.
While I do not intend to continue the program on this blog, I heard quite a number of very interesting reasons, given, I was honestly surprised, by men! Throughout my listening time, only men called in! I wonder why that is.

Thursday, March 22

Confused Race

Helter skelter they ran
In a perfect formation of chaos
Yelling, screaming, the people ran

And as they ran, the circle, if you could call it a circle, increased
And as people saw others running, they joined in the race
Not understanding why

In one direction, the order of chaos increased
People were running
What could be chasing them? No one knew

But as each sighted another running, they ran
What could it be?
What is the danger?

Could it be some policeman has gone berserk?
Could it be tear gas?
Could it be a bomb?

Could it be an explosion?
Could it be kidnappers?
Could it be armed robbers?

What could be causing this chaos?
Helter skelter they ran
Arriving at a destination, a barricade, an end

They were forced to stop
Careening into one another
What was chasing them?

It was their shadow.


Be Free oh.

Thursday, March 15

(Let's be) Responsible

A few days ago, I read, in careless passing (I am so ashamed to confess) about someone who committed suicide after he/she had posted it on Face book  that he/she would. Read and gave no thought to it.  #Bad. Myne Whitman had written about it a few months ago, I believe.
Committing suicide after posting it on FB ot twitter is becoming the norm. What excuse do we now have if we read before the act itself takes place, as opposed to first finding a body, then discovering a note.
So here I sit, eyes glazed and lost in thought, wondering who the friends of these people are, and not just who, but how many, on Facebook. I saw a funny post (on the same Face book) about someone who had died but only a handful of people attended his funeral, despite the fact that he had over 2000 friends on FB. We are not discounting (and whoever doesn’t think so is living in denial) the fact that majority of face book friends are just that…’face’ friends. There is no real relationship, no depth. The connection is only on face book, and anything outside it has to take real and conscious effort, and that usually happens when a personal relationship with the person already exist and you see them from time to time.

So, my thoughts as touching this very sad phenomenon veered toward taking responsibility for people who befriend us, and vice versa, either in person, or on all these social networks. Taking (as much as possible) an interest in their lives; what they say, what their philosophy is, trying to decipher their comments and updates. No one just speaks, no one. There is always a message, however subtle, behind everything that comes out of the mouth.
While it may be impossible to take an interest in the hundreds, if not thousands of people befriending and following us, I believe we owe a measure of responsibility to them because they believed that we have something that  is good enough to pique their interest, enough to follow us.
It is time to do away with superficial relationships;  and not  gather friends for numbers’ sake. Are we in a competition?
We have repeatedly said that doing good does not have to begin in a big way, it really is in the little things that make up our day, and not necessarily only to people we know. Each day I try to ask myself if I stand condemned or justified in my actions as regards doing good to my ‘neighbor’. What am I remembered for? I really wonder.
I am resolved to take responsibility (as much as I possibly can), going forward, so help me God.

I happened to go searching for a statistical number of suicides that were announced on Face book before they happened, I found this link, which says pretty much what you have read up here…and will limit it to just this one link.

Be Free oh.

Tuesday, March 13

Then and Now

After discovering those journals and diaries I wrote about in the last post, swamped with memories and a driving need to put faces to some, I went searching for pictures…into the big wooden box I dug and unearthed…you cannot believe the photos…some must NEVER, ever see the light of day! My sister and I had such a good laugh, omg.

In that endless depths of knickknacks,  I found so many  photos of me with various hairstyles (sorry, but I doubt we would ever hear the last of Zouzou’s head) natural hair, weave on, wig, braids etc etc. So I uploaded one (see below) as my BB display picture.…you can best imagine the number of comments that came in! I couldn’t believe people actually thought I was born this way, without hair?!  Comments such as ‘see Zainab with hair!’ ‘Zee, you get hair?!”…so I uploaded a lot more. Finally, I uploaded one (above) which I have now sworn would remain on the BB display forever! #Vanity. No one could guess my age, not one person came close….mid-teens, late teens, mid-twenties…hmm, I was 37, it was taken shortly before I went ‘ashorn.’

Natural hair!!!!

After all the back and forth, the consensus seem to be ‘we prefer you with hair’…imagine?! I was positively shocked and felt betrayed *sniff* Everyone who had said I looked good suddenly had a change of mind. #Offended!

I am sorry to disappoint you all, because you will have to wait a while (I cant honestly tell you how long) as I do not feel the tiniest need or desire to go back just yet. Cant you imagine the freedom I have found? Cant you? Try, remove the time, resources and drama it took you to arrive at what you are presently carrying as your hairstyle....I really must have suffered trauma back then.

My friend, Nike is very unpredictable, you would never guess what look she is sporting the next time you run into her. She has been going back and forth between having her hair cut and grown for a bit longer than I have had mine cut.…she suggested I do the same, but….hmmmm,  naaaa….I think not!

Do you think you would ever have your hair cut, if only to be adventurous?